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An Open Household – Ikenna Paschal Okpaleke

Household

Growing up in a predominantly Catholic neighbourhood, I felt no tension with others who were not Catholics. The family next door were Pentecostals. This was in the heydays of Pentecostalism, in the 80s when we had only the likes of Assemblies of God, Deeper Life Bible Church and Scripture Union. Our neighbors were just an amazing family. Almost everything blended: their dad had same job as my dad, and their mum was also a primary school teacher as mine. Both families were ‘strangers’ in that little town. Our parents were the best of friends and we, the kids, followed suit. There was no problem sleeping over in each other’s house when either of the parents are out of time. We cared for each other. We played together. We loved each other. We ate together most times. We prayed together even more. It did not prevent anyone of us from attending his or her church the next Sunday. The Amaefules remain amazing even when I discovered them some 13 years later after they had relocated to another city in a nearby State.

I learnt from my parents to happily enjoy the humanity of the other, his or her faith affiliation notwithstanding. The amiable Anglican Bishop Nwizuzu spent some Sunday evenings in my home and it was all laughter with my parents. Well, we only heard the exciting strokes of laughter from the inside, since our duty then consisted of opening the door, courteously welcoming the visitor, serving him or her with kola and disappearing with the speed of lightening, and of course, re-appearing again at the end to clear the side-table. You dare not stand there gaping at the mouth of elders as they chatted away! Our home was never an ecumenical Mecca of any sort but I hardly saw any tension in the visit of other non-Catholics. With time, some extended family members embraced other Christian communities, yet we never lost our family embrace.

Today, I see the tension everywhere. For some Pentecostals, Roman Catholics will all perish in hell. And for some Catholics, these separated brethren are only wasting their time. The shall all ‘come back home’ to the true Church someday. The bickering continues. I recall an incidence where a popular Pentecostal pastor who was nominated as a member of Abia State Pilgrim’s Board with the responsibility of vetting those intending to embark on pilgrimage to the Holy Land, once passed a sarcastic comment on a priest interviewee: “You Catholic priests,” said he, in a very derogatory manner, “your bishops don’t allow you to read the Bible. Isn’t it?” He asked sarcastically. The priest never replied and maintained his calm. It is altogether not clear why such statement was made. Without pointing out the volume of ignorance in such a comment, it goes without saying that it was either prompted by a stereotypical notion of Catholics which has roots in the 16thCentury Reformation or by a seeming psychological complex. To be fair, some Catholic priests also make their own derogatory remarks about other churches and pastors.

Often times churches have engaged in highlighting the human ills that are found in one another rather than focus on the center of our faith convictions. This is not to say that we refrain from calling out evil. Rather, by pointing out the deficiency in another, we could actually be prophetic in a way, since that would help in calling one another to repentance and conversion. Yet, this should be done in love and not out of spite. If I may ask: Where is the Trinity in our diatribes? Where is Jesus in the fight against one another? It is true that some churches also attack the doctrines of the other, but one wonders the motive behind such attacks. Is the motive to prove superior and win over converts? Does one really need to destroy others in order to prove himself or herself authentic, holy or righteous?

If we can do away with a lot of prejudices and the scramble for membership and territory, we can begin to appreciate each other even when we are convinced of the ‘deficiencies’ in the faith of the other. To appreciate each other, we can begin by tolerating one another. Tolerance opens the door to working together in what is today known as social ecumenism as we collectively fight for justice and peace. More still, it opens the door of spiritual ecumenism, where we create opportunities of praying and praising God together without offending the unique practices or beliefs of our different churches. I think it is time to critically examine some of the unnecessary walls that set us against one another and move towards a greater co-operation while maintaining our unique identities. We can at least agree on mutual tolerance. Jesus had to tolerate those who were preaching and casting our demons in his name (cf. Mark 9:38; Lk 9:49). So tolerant was Christ that he never disparaged the Jewish religion for all its ‘limitations’, He still identified with it. Think about this: Jesus would be seen in a relaxed engagement with a Samaritan woman even at the risk of scandalizing his disciples (John 4:1-42), and he did not fail to recognize the ‘great faith’ of the Canaanite woman despite pointing out the boundaries between Jews and Canaanites (Matt. 15:22-28).

If Jesus did so, why do we fail to respect and tolerate one another?

34 thoughts on “An Open Household – Ikenna Paschal Okpaleke”

  1. Beautiful piece Fr. If we could ask ourselves ‘what would Jesus do?’ prior to many actions and diatribes, we would sure love better.

    May God’s Grace abound as we strive to achieve the ‘oneone’ Jesus prayed for.

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  3. Highly invigorating. The initial social and historical parlance gave it a soothing introduction. However, it became theological and more, spiritually edifying.

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  5. Wonderful articulation of how religion that is meant to mend us has marred us. the remedies proffered can’t be overemphasized.

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  7. This is the best piece i’ve read in a while..👌
    Its a good thing people like “you” still exist…

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  9. This sums it all up. Feels like someone is finally speaking my mind. Nice one Mr Paschal. If only we truly understand what Christianity is all about, I think it would save a lot of stress and too much talk.

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  11. Nice one Rev… I will share this.. our society today needs to promote tolerance within Christianity. Thanks for sharing.

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  12. Wonderful article. Our society will be a better place to live in if everyone or most people have this mindset.

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  14. Is it safe to say most Christians of back then were more genuine in their faith than Christians of these days? I think it is the self righteousness that has crept into the Church. A self righteous preacher is a danger to the society, because you can imagine what is being passed on to the flock. Thank you Padre. This is food for thought. I pray this message can go round the world.

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  15. This piece got me
    I pray we will realize that the discriminations going on between dominations in the Christian faith can lead us to heaven cause Jesus is lover of all persons.

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  16. This piece got me.
    I pray that the discriminations going on between dominations in the Christian faith cannot lead us to heaven.
    This first comment there was a mistake Fr.

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